YSAK 422: Free motorcycle, with strings attached

Stupid bloody Blogger. You're going to have to click on that to read it. Or just read the text below.

Moving to Australia!! Trading the girlfriend in for a surfer chick!
The girlfriend comes with 2 motorcycle helmets, a jacket and a motorcycle.

About the bike:
2005 Kawasaki ZZR 600 (ZX600 Ninja)
CERTIFIED and ready to ride.
2000 km.
Casually ridden by mature rider.
Original stock parts with brand new battery and new front tire.
Great motorcycle for 1st time riders and sport touring riders.
Well maintained and stored in indoor garage year-round.
Had flawless 20K scheduled maintenance.
Won't cost you a fortune in insurance.
Accident-free and never been dropped.
Body is in great condition execpt for a few scratches on left exhaust pipe from previous owner.
BONUS! Price includes black Arai Drudi Performance helmet (Large), black matte Zeus passenger helmet (Small), and grey/black Infinit (Large) motorcycle jacket (retail value of $500).
Also available for purchase is a Scorpion All-In-Naked (Silver) leather jacket (rarely worn): $130

About the girlfriend:
1970 French Canadian SWF 41.
Blonde with blue eyes.
CERTIFIED crazy and never ready to ride.
Mileage unknown but probably high.
Casually ridden by numerous riders.
Original stock parts with new front airbags.
Great girlfriend for sport-dating riders.
Well maintained and stored in master bedroom year-round.
Had flawless yearly checkup.
Won’t cost you a fortune in gas money.
Accident-free but has been dropped a few times.
Body is in great condition except for a few bruises from riding too hard by previous owner.

I'm leaving on August 31st so I'm looking to close this deal as soon as possible. No money back on the girlfriend if she doesn't ride well!

The hell with the bike ... let's look at the girlfriend, who appears to be wearing an "Algonquin" shirt: