Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Woman trying like crazy to end up in a Missed Connections Kijiji ad

Ever since Kijiji killed off the Personals section some years ago, we've been without a source of pathetic horny-hound amusement. It was fun for some to troll through the ads with a sense of moral superiority. I suppose some even used it to meet people for casual encounters or long term relationships or whatever people did there. Now all we're left with is Friendship and Missed Connections.

I have my hunches that about half the ads under Friendship are a thinly disguised replacement for Casual Encounters ads: "Mid-30s couple seeks bisexual woman for friendship." I dunno, maybe I'm just cynical.

The Missed Connection ads are shorter, tamer, but can offer the same condescending voyeuristic thrill of wondering what kind of deluded and desperate individuals would write about a brief glance shared at a gas station or dollar store. "You were the frazzled-looking brunette with the crying two-year-old in the express lane at the Superstore; I was behind you buying a Hungry Man Fried Chicken dinner and twelve-pack of PC Diet Cola. I'm sure I felt a connection. Coffee?" Obviously that example is contrived, since no one on Kijiji uses semicolons.

Jessica Hoy from Sylvan Lake, Alberta has embraced the concept and is hell-bent on being Missedly Connected.

She calls herself Miss Connection, and her blog is called Miss Connection. The site address is http://missconnectionreddeer.blogspot.com/ and is devilishly hard to find on Google if you don't know what you're looking for, so bookmark it right now, baloney.

"My New Years resolution for this year is to have one written about me," she writes in her opening post. "I will be spending one hour every day in a different public place making eye contact with strangers. I will write about my experiences in each place one week after they happen so I can see if I get any results before posting."

So far, no results. It's not like Jessica's ugly. (See photo at left.) It's not like she lacks game -- she shows off that snazzy finger-gun gesture, even when wearing mittens. Maybe men are intimidated? Maybe she's not frequenting liquor stores and supermarkets often enough?

Let's follow Jessica on Twitter and see if any of this pans out. I'd like the story to have a happy ending.

3 Responses to “Woman trying like crazy to end up in a Missed Connections Kijiji ad”

Mike S. said...
January 25, 2012 at 9:42 AM

I think the eye contact is what's killing her. Real Missed Connection targets seem to have one common feature - the miss-ee exhibits no extant awareness that the miss-er exists, much less was within several hundred thousand ängstroms of them.


MissConnection_ said...
January 25, 2012 at 8:31 PM

Thank you so much for the awesome review! I'm sending some internet finger guns your way!!


Anonymous said...
August 12, 2012 at 10:22 PM

You're absolutely pathetic. When you said you were taking a break from social media I was so happy. Why the f*ck are you back? Shark Week jokes were funny in 2009. Get a life.


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