Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Divorcing my dirty slut of a bicycle (546)

Finally, a new twist on bicycle advertising. The extra-hype thing has been done. Let's get into anthropomorphized bicycles starring in dramatic short screenplays! Scroll down to the end for the matching pictures.

Divorcing my almost NEW Giant XTC 2 - $750 (waterdown)
Price $750.00
Address Waterdown, Hamilton, ON L0R, Canada

Me - We need to talk
ME - I... I don't think we should see each other anymore

XTC = What! Why?

ME - It's not you, I swear.

XTC - I'm too big... that's it isn't it!

ME = no, not at all... Hell, I'm 6'. technically I'm too big for you.

XTC - Is it my shifters? You don't like the Deore's anymore...

ME - No! I'm telling you it's me, you're perfect. You ride better than any other bike

XTC - What!!! you a$$ hole! you've been riding other bikes!
XTC - god I can't believe you!

ME - Yes, ok I admit it! you're just too... hybrid for me.

XTC - Her shocks are bigger aren't they.

ME - god dammit, can we not... please.

XTC - I hate you. As soon as I find someone new I'm leaving.

ME - hahaha, don't make me laugh, what are you gunna do, post a classified on kijiji?

.... ... ... ...

F*ck you Giant.XTC 2.... I hate you... even though we were only together for less than a year, you let me ride you maybe 10 times! I never want to see you again.
Here are all the naked pictures I have of you... I hope everyone see's what a wh0re you are.
s!ut
pickup only


1 Responses to “Divorcing my dirty slut of a bicycle (546)”

Anonymous said...
May 24, 2012 at 8:44 AM

Funny


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