Monday, June 18, 2012

Chuck Norris kicked my Corsica: You buy it (609)

Who can really blame Chuck Norris for taking a boot to this 1992 Corsica? But hey, for $250, why not buy it just for the story? You'll still have to explain why Chuck was on Kijiji Medicine Hat.

Chevrolet "Kicked by Chuck Norris" Corsica 1992
Price $250.00
Address Medicine Hat, AB T1A 5L1, Canada
Make Chevrolet
Model Corsica
Year 1992
Kilometers 175000

First of all, let's all admit: THIS CAR IS DIRT CHEAP. Let's go over why:

1) I have a new car. This means the corsica is taking up space.
2) It needs a new fuel filter ($150). It runs fine but stutters on acceleration because I am a horrible owner and neglected to get a new filter. Therefore, you need one. But math time kiddies--$250 + $150 = INCREDIBLE DEAL.
3) I am so lazy, I need to sell this ASAP because I have paid 3 months and counting of insurance on a car that I do not drive.
4) CHUCK NORRIS KICKED THIS CAR IN THE SIDE. It was a tragic accident. I survived, thank you for asking. But the car has a dent on the side with a little wing due to Mr Norris' size 12 foot of steel. It probably still hurts. Only upside is the little wing is aerodynamic, I'm sure. You decide.

A few more details:
-tape deck*
-great on gas
-no rust
-fine tires
-great car for your good for nothing 16 year old son: there will be no picking up chicks or getting tickets for doing 120 on Dunmore in the corsicamobile. No sir.
-Also great for around town, zippy little thing but not too much pep or your toupee will blow around.
-Hand crank windows to beef up the aforementioned good for nothing son's arms. WE ALL HAVE TO DO A LITTLE WORK THERE, JUNIOR.
-unicorns love corsicas. Proven fact.

*if you don't know what a tape deck, then this car is PERFECT FOR YOU.

If you would like to own a little piece of amazingness, give me a call. Come drive it, for $250 (FIRM) it is yours. I am available any time after 5pm on weekdays, I prefer that you call because c'mon. This thing will be going fast.

First of all, let's all admit: THIS CAR IS DIRT CHEAP. Let's go over why: 1) I have a new car. This means the corsica is taking up space. 2) It needs a new fuel filter ($150). It runs fine but stutters on acceleration because I am a horrible owner and neglected to get a new filter. Therefore, you need one. But math time kiddies--$250 + $150 = INCREDIBLE DEAL. 3) I am so lazy, I need to sell this ASAP because I have paid 3 months and counting of insurance on a car that I do not drive. 4) CHUCK NORRIS KICKED THIS CAR IN THE SIDE. It was a tragic accident. I survived, thank you for asking. But the car has a dent on the side with a little wing due to Mr Norris' size 12 foot of steel. It probably still hurts. Only upside is the little wing is aerodynamic, I'm sure. You decide. A few more details: -tape deck* -great on gas -no rust -fine tires -great car for your good for nothing 16 year old son: there will be no picking up chicks or getting tickets for doing 120 on Dunmore in the corsicamobile. No sir. -Also great for around town, zippy little thing but not too much pep or your toupee will blow around. -Hand crank windows to beef up the aforementioned good for nothing son's arms. WE ALL HAVE TO DO A LITTLE WORK THERE, JUNIOR. -unicorns love corsicas. Proven fact. *if you don't know what a tape deck, then this car is PERFECT FOR YOU. If you would like to own a little piece of amazingness, give me a call. Come drive it, for $250 (FIRM) it is yours. I am available any time after 5pm on weekdays, I prefer that you call because c'mon. This thing will be going fast.

author

This post was written by:

Gord McCord, webmaster at You Suck at Kijiji, makes fun of funny things on Kijiji. Do not take him too seriously. Also do not take yourself too seriously. Follow him on Twitter

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