Friday, July 20, 2012

Can a refrigerator save your marriage? (631)

Sometimes a marriage needs a "cooling-off" period before resolving issues. How better to cool an overheated relationship than with a twenty-dollar garage refrigerator? This Kijiji Winnipeg icebox could be the answer.

STOP FIGHTING WITH YOUR LADY - ONLY $20 (fridge, refrigerator)

Price $20.00
Address Winnipeg, MB, Canada

Listen, we know you've been fighting with your lady. Some arguments have been reasonable, some not-so-reasonable. So, you're often confined to your cave. These days, the basement is now often the child-sanctuary, or, it's where your lady spends her time scrap-booking, and you're forced to find refuge elsewhere: the garage.

This is where I swoop in, like a masked superhero, except I'm better. How? Let me explain. You're sitting in your garage, blasting Journey's Greatest Hits, slamming back a few brews with your buds. Except that tiny little Coleman cooler isn't anywhere near enough to hold the amount of beer you guys need...you need a fridge. A garage-friendly fridge. One that must be uglier than the one in your kitchen (because, if it's nicer, there will be hell to pay).



Listen, we know you've been fighting with your man. He forgets to clean the gutters. He never puts the toilet seat down. He's a man...he's just gross...and you don't want him contaminating the basement while your kids are playing, and you clearly don't want him getting his car-oil covered hands all over your scrap-booking supplies, so you send him to the garage. Cold in the winter, too hot in the summer.

This is where I swoop in, like a bare-chested Fabio on a white horse, hair flowing like willows in the wind. You want your man to know he did wrong...but you don't want him to suffer...so he needs a fridge. An UGLY fridge, to know that you care, but not too much. Definitely not one nicer than the one in your kitchen, because, let's face it...a garage fridge should not cost more than $20. Oh, look! What am I carrying with me on my horse?


Yes, that's right, ladies and gents. I have that garage fridge for you. Cheap enough so your wife doesn't get mad that you bought it, and ugly enough that your husband will know that you're angry at him.

Make each other happy in the middle of this miserably hot summer! Who knows....I might have just saved your relationship.

Asking $20. Or, an unwanted, unopened bottle of alcohol (because I have also been confined to the garage).

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